I see this passed around the internet like a badge of honor. Shouted from the rooftops proclaiming you are officially a better mom if your life consists solely around making sure your nuggets are tended to. I am here to disagree. Gasp. I actually think hobbies and activities outside of your mom duties help make you better wife, mother, friend, etc. Let me explain:
While being completely pigeon holed into a single activity may seem like the best way to be the most awesome version of yourself, it’s not. Variety is the spice of life. Lets embrace it.
3.5 years ago I was lucky enough to become a mother. I still ask myself daily how I ever became fortunate enough to be entrusted with this miraculous human life, but here I am a mothering the hell out of them all while having hobbies, passions, aspirations that come from other things besides changing diapers. A new person within me was born in my the day I became a mother. I had a 12 week maternity leave and figured I would teach myself to paint furniture. It became a hobby, a creative outlet, and eventually a small business that 3.5 years later I am still rocking.
For all those saying, “I don’t have time for hobbies like you since I work” (i hear you and my ears are bleeding). I am NOW a work from home mom but for the first 18 months of my daughters life I worked full time away from home with a LONG commute. When I got home, I changed clothes grab my little nugget and we headed outside to get our fitness on. Surely there were other ways to spend our time together before dinner and bed, but having this crazy Crossfit addiction aka hobby led us to spending lots of nights in the garage together. Know what she asks me daily now, “are we going to the gym today?” She’s the best accountability partner I’ve ever had. She shows up daily and I have a feeling I am setting her up for a lifetime of great health knowing that she will look at this as a normal part of a day.
So TODAY l challenge you to find 3 hobbies with the characteristics listed above and shout them out in the comments section below. (Showering doesn’t count, you should be doing that daily as well.) We are all here to cheer you on. Get your mom tribe together and get to hobbying. I think we owe it to our children and spouses but most importantly to ourselves to have hobbies and things that separate us from our “job” as mom. Find something that ignites fire in your soul. No excuses. I have no nanny, no family that watches my kids, they have actually never even been to a babysitter and they aren’t in school and yet I find a way EVERYDAY. Currently my hobby is theirs so I hand them a brush when I paint or a jumprope when I work out. They don’t hate it. But let’s get this clear my hobbies are theirs, not their hobbies are mine. There’s difference.
First off… I read it!!! Second I whole- heartedly agree. I used to feel bad that I had “hobbies” and interests that didn’t all pertain to being a mother but now I believe it makes me a better momma to my littles! I also like to paint furniture and do projects around the house, I monogram/ embroider for my “Lulu money”, and I am in CFCS 5-6 days a week!!!
Modern Day Moguls says
I think we are made to feel guilty and it needs to stop! I would assume your fam agrees with me that because of your wide range of hobbies you are a better mom! Keep kicking ass.
tracy n says
I’m not a mom right now but I was able to witness those things you describe with my mom, sister and a few of my friends. I salute them, you and the rest of moms who choice to have a life outside motherhood. Strangely, (I feel bad sometimes) that some of the person who made me feel guilty for having hobbies are also moms (relatives and some of my friends) They think I’m wasting my time doing all of sort things that I think make me a better person. Can you enlighten me why they do this because ,if motherhood can change your life and made you a busy person, why on earth they have the time to look into my life?
Modern Day Moguls says
Motherhood is no doubt hard and mom guilt it real. Problem is mom guilt typically comes from society and other moms who have lost themselves and want to validate there loss by making others feel bad. Rock on with your hobbies you will be a happier and more productive person because of them. And hopefully you inspire those that have made you feel bad in the past.